How double standards can harm a relationship - Hindustan Times

How double standards can harm a relationship

By, Delhi
Aug 02, 2023 12:02 PM IST

From disrespect to hindering personal growth, here are a few ways by which double standards can harm a relationship.

Double standards can damage a relationship beyond repair. When we figure out double standards in a relationship, it is important to address the same with the partner as soon as possible before it starts to become a major issue. "Double standards are damaging to relationships. When they’re present they erode emotional connection, trust and create an unhealthy environment that lacks a sense of emotional safety. To have a healthy and thriving relationship, it is crucial to recognize and address any double standards that may be present," wrote Therapist Lucille Shackleton as she explained how double standards can ruin a relationship.

How double standards can harm a relationship(Unsplash/@Afif Ramdhasuma)
How double standards can harm a relationship(Unsplash/@Afif Ramdhasuma)

Double standards refer to different ways by which the partners are treated by each other. It also refers to the different set of rules and expectations for different partners. When a partner is treated in a different way in a similar situation than the other partner, it can be an example of double standard in the relationship. When double standards continue, it can lead to resentment and conflict, further leading to emotional abuse.

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Why are double standards harmful? The therapist explained the reasons:

Disrespect: Double standards create an imbalance of power and responsibilities within the relationship – with time, this can lead to disrespect and the other person not feeling valued enough to be in the relationship.

Communication: This also prohibits the partners from having honest and open communication, leading to dishonesty and barriers in the relationship. One partner can feel the fear of being judged and misunderstood for sharing their thoughts, and hence they may refrain from having a honest conversation.

Self-esteem: When we are subjected to double standards in the relationship, it can harm our sense of identity and self-esteem. This leads to the feeling of being inadequate in the relationship and diminished sense of self-worth and self-confidence.

Personal growth: Often double standards in a relationship are a reflection of societal expectations and gender stereotypes. This can hinder personal growth and make a person filled with self-doubt.

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