6 reasons we may fear love: Therapist explains

Falling in love involves a lot of risk. Sometimes we fear that being vulnerable to the ones we love will eventually get us hurt. Hence, we fear love.

Updated on: Jan 10, 2023 8:35 AM IST

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Published on Jan 10, 2023 8:35 AM

Love is one of the most beautiful feelings in the world. It makes us feel strong, and yet vulnerable to the ones we love. However, in some cases, people fear having this amount of intimacy and vulnerability for a person. Hence, they shy away from being in a relationship, or experiencing love. But why does it happen? Psychotherapist Emily H Sanders explored a few reasons as to why people fear falling in love. “There are many reasons we may fear love and intimacy; it can be so scary to step into the unknowns that come with a new relationship,” she added. (Pexels)

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We fear that we will get exposed to getting hurt. This brings back trauma of old pain which we may have experiences at some point in the past, which makes us fear the recent relationship.  (Pexels)

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Falling in love involves a lot of risk. Sometimes we fear that being vulnerable to the ones we love will eventually get us hurt. Hence, we fear love.  (Pexels)

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Old trauma of people getting hurt by us can come up in such circumstances. Hence, we feel that we will end up hurting the person we love. “These fears can be conscious and/or unconscious- it’s really important to make the unconscious ones conscious so we can address our fears and set unhelpful defenses aside,” Emily H Sanders added.  (Pexels)

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Many of us are brought up in homes where we had to struggle to hold our value. This creates self-doubt in us, and makes us feel unlovable. This fear of feeling unloved makes us fear relationships as well.  (Pexels)

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Falling in love can create a separation from the family of origin. This can be an intimidating and a difficult feeling to deal with.  (Pexels)

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Some of us have gone through family patterns of divorce, bad parenting, etc. Hence, this makes us believe that we will repeat the same patterns in our relationships as well.  (Pexels)