Let heartbreak not break you: Tips to move on from a broken relationship
Breakups can be painful and difficult. Though there is no fixed mantra to deal with them, experts suggest a few things to keep in mind to move on faster without letting heartbreaks affect us any further.Updated: Jan 26, 2020 07:25 IST
Have you spent days on a couch, curtains drawn, staring at your phone, poking it and scrolling through it mindlessly, with messages and calls unreturned? It feels like a force that wrenches your gut, a punch that rips your heart out, leaving you vulnerable, broken and in a sea of never-ending grief.
In 2018, when Risha, a 22-year-old psychology student in Delhi, had her first heartbreak, she felt like she was “gasping for breath”.
- Don’t stalk or text your ex
- Maintain a healthy routine
- Exercise regularly and eat right
- Talk to friends and family
- Take up new hobbies and activities
- Do anything that makes you happy
- Seek help from a counsellor.
“It felt like my heart actually stopped beating for a while. I couldn’t think. I felt so broken. It felt like my system shut down and I couldn’t function at all. For some time, it was just anger. Then it turned into grief. And there was no end to it,” she admitted.
Heartbreaks are ugly and there is no denying it. But then, can we just avoid heartbreaks from happening to us ever again in our life and look the other way? If only we had no fault in our stars.
While it is inevitable, and maybe with every heartbreak, we emerge a little stronger, a little tougher and a little bit wiser. It is not just the pain one goes through, it is the pain of coming back from something that is lost, picking up every broken piece from the past, and stitching a new beginning with it.
Managing heartbreak, basically, is an art. But how exactly do we master it?
While a lot of people find comfort in shutting themselves down, avoiding the world after a heartbreak, or checking up on their ex and stalking them on social media platforms, Kavita Mungi, a mental health counsellor suggests, “The best way to deal with heartbreak is to continue to work and have a good routine with a balance of work, exercise and sleep.” She further adds, “Indulging in a good hobby or taking some classes can be therapeutic.”
One of the most important aspects according to the experts is “practicing self-compassion for the person who broke your heart. It is important to let go and be positive about it”.
Geetanjali Saxena, a mental health counsellor, says, “Stay positive as you start a new chapter. Try getting involved in new activities you once loved, but haven’t engaged in for a while. You can try new activities. Stay physically healthy by eating right.”
She highlights,“It helps if you have good friends and family. You can reach out to them and seek help. Sharing your thoughts with them will help you unload your burden and give you a better sense of things. It will also bring you a sense of comfort. In times like these, friends and family play a pivotal role.”