From adolescent to adult: think for yourself
As you move from one stage of development to the next, a key change you need to bring about is in how you thinkUpdated: Jul 06, 2011 10:37 IST
Growing up is a long journey. Moving from one developmental stage to the next, one needs to bring about a change in oneself and in how one reacts and responds to different situations. This is very much applicable when one moves from being an adolescent to an adult. As these changes occur, a significant change that needs to be brought about is in how one thinks.
1 Know yourself: Know who you are. Try and develop a good understanding of your skills and abilities to be able to utilise them for your benefit. Be aware of your self such that you can move ahead in life on the path of success.
2 Ask elders: Your elders are there to provide you guidance in all spheres of life. Use their experiences and knowledge to help develop your abilities to understand and to think about things.
3 Accept different views: Every individual has his or her perspective and way of doing things. There will be a difference in your and others' views which does not necessarily make one or the other right or wrong. So accept these differences and instead look into them to develop alternative perspectives.
4 Do not force your views on others: Just as you have your perspective and opinion about things, others are entitled to have theirs. Forcing them to see things your way does not help at all. If you do not agree with someone on a particular aspect, then having an open discussion is a better way of approaching the situation rather than pushing your view.
5 Be a problem-solver: Be in a problem-solving mode. Don't procrastinate. Take a proactive approach to problems. Work at resolving them rather than running away from them because in the end pressures relating to these problems only increase.
6 Look at all options before making a decision: Weighing options is important. Look at the different ways of approaching a situation. Try and evaluate what are the alternatives and how using them would work for you. Having a clear understanding of the pros and cons of the available options would enable you to make the best choice possible in your decision-making exercise.
7 Do a cost-benefit analysis: Behaving or reacting in a particular manner would have its benefits as well as its pitfalls. Do a cost benefit analysis. Try and determine for yourself what the possible pros and cons of doing a particular thing are. Then make a decision moving in the direction of maximising benefits to you.
8 Accept your mistakes: Everybody makes mistakes. Anybody can be prone to situational pitfalls. It is important instead to try and accept your mistakes and learn from them. Avoid erring again and build on your skill base to be able to do so.
9 Be creative: Think out of the box. Being conventional and making predetermined choices is not always the best route to take. Instead try and be creative. Think beyond the mundane. Try and develop novel ideas to approach situations and respond to them.
10 Learn from the past: A lot of things happen in our lives and it is imperative that one learns from experiences and utilise them to be successful.
The author is a psychiatrist, and chief, Department of Mental Health and Behavioural Sciences, Max Healthcare