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No DRS system in love

Uncle Cyrus answers your queries.

entertainment Updated: Feb 09, 2012 18:39 IST
Cyrus Broacha
Cyrus Broacha
Hindustan Times

I am 22. I am in a relationship with a girl who has been my classmate since a year and a half. Now she’s gone abroad for further studies. She often forwards me pictures of her with other guys and says she likes their company. This makes me sad. She would never do that in India. Also, she avoids me at times. A few days ago, she told me not to get depressed if our relationship doesn’t continue. She also doesn’t miss me anymore. But I miss her a lot and can’t concentrate on my studies. How should I motivate myself? What should my attitude towards life be?
Mr Lonely
Dear Mr. lonely, welcome to planet pointless. This is a lesser-known planet, small in size, which rears its head from time to time and leaves a lasting impact. It’s as clear as the 2G scam that she’s moved on, both geographically and emotionally. You will feel depressed for a while. But look on the bright side, this depression will not be as long lasting as the one you'll feel after getting married. After its all done and dusted, send her a long letter of closure interspersed with pictures of you and Priyanka Chopra and you and Angelina Jolie. Thanks to Photoshop, these unions are no longer totally absurd.

I am 18, good looking, have a well-built physic, but am very shy. I know a lot of girls, but don’t know how to break the ice and talk to them. I am a confident person, but I really don’t know what happens to me in the presence of girls. I just can’t make the first move. Please help.
Anurag, your physique may be good, but your spellings are atrocious. Look, you need to follow the process. You are not ready for girls. First you need to build your confidence. Start by talking with to men with long hair, then move on to gay men. Next, talk to masculine women. Only when you are comfortable with these groups, take your plunge into socialisation attempts with genuine conventional females. Follow the process, and don't jump the queue.

I am 17 and madly in love with a classmate. I just can’t stop thinking about her. Because of her, I don’t even flirt with other girls. After my HSC exams, I’m going to propose to her. If she rejects me, at least I’ll hate her and eventually forget her and move on. Am I right? If not, what should I do?
Awesome Dude
Awesome Dude, I have a confession. You indeed are awesome and I love you. By answering your
question in the second part of your question, you have saved me both time and effort. For that I thank you. Do exactly as you say,. I think during your summer vacations, you should intern with me.

I am 16 and fell in love with a boy from my class at first sight. He stared at me, gave me chocolates, smiled, chatted and then said he had a girlfriend. He is very cute and sweet. We meet daily, so it’s not possible to neglect him. No one looks better than him. I think he knows that I like him. What to do?
Regular Reader
Maybe his girlfriend has diabetes, so he couldn't give her the chocolates. This is a tough one. He, like all of us men, wants his chocolates and wants to eat yours as well. Keep chipping away. He might slowly come around to preferring your Perk to her Kit Kat (kit). He's obviously in the game and remember in love, there is no DRS system So do you want to risk playing or do you want to do a Sahara?

Just write to uncle cy:
And I’ll give you some relief…. err… that is, provided, I’m not doing a headstand at the time.

First Published: Feb 09, 2012 13:10 IST