Exclusive| Dia Mirza: Allow a child to communicate openly about things pertaining to their sexuality

Actor Dia Mirza urges parents to raise respectful boys, emphasising the importance of consent and open discussions about sexuality.

Several sexual assault cases have come to light recently, from the alleged gang rape of a 17-year-old in a Delhi park to the molestation of a teenage girl in Bihar, leaving the nation shaken. Actor Dia Mirza Rekhi was among the celebrities to speak out, sharing a note on Instagram on Tuesday urging everyone to “Raise boys who won’t cause harm”. A mother to five-year-old Avyaan, the actor tells us that she believes the foundations of respect and equality are laid at home.

Dia Mirza

“Children notice how the men treat women at home, whether household and parenting duties are shared, and whether a woman’s boundaries are respected,” she shares, adding, “As a child gets older, parents should speak openly about fantasy, sex and the unhealthy representation of sex in pornography.”

Speaking about the values she wants her son to grow up with, she says, “I want my son to understand that consent is not simply the absence of a ‘no’; it is the presence of a willing ‘yes’. That nobody owes him their attention, affection or intimacy, and that rejection is not an insult to his sense of self. Because if we want our girls to grow up in a safer, more equal world, we have to raise our boys to help create it.”

For Dia, boys should also be encouraged to speak up when they witness disrespect towards women. “Equality is achieved when men and boys learn to stand up against acts of oppression in any form and situation,” she says.

Addressing at what age what age parents should sensitise boys the actor says it should start on day one. She says, “Between setting an example of gender equality at home and having the necessary conversations that are age appropriate and relevant. For example, teaching a child to be comfortable with their anatomy. Calling a penis a penis. Not assigning shame to private parts.” She adds, “Allowing a child to communicate openly about things pertaining to their sexuality is important. As a child gets older, speaking openly about fantasy, about sex, about the unhealthy representation of sex in pornography there are so many ways we can help build a stronger values and a understanding of healthy relationships.”

She points out it's most important to raise boys to call out disrespect to women when they witness it. “This could be in class, in a locker room, in a chat, online or any space they occupy. Because equality is achieved when men and boys learn to stand up against acts of oppression in any and all forms and situations,” she says.