How to deal with a break up, this step-by-step guide approved by love experts will help
Break-ups are messy. They bring with them a flood of memories – good and bad, feeling of helplessness and mostly, profound grief. Here’s how you can deal with a heartbreak without letting it bring you down.Updated: Jul 30, 2018 14:18 IST
The end of any relationship is never easy. There’s heartbreak, sadness, feeling of loss, anger – way too many negative emotions are associated with a break up. But does it have to be this hard? Break-ups are messy. They bring with them a flood of memories – good and bad, feeling of helplessness and mostly, profound grief. According to a study published in The Journal of Positive Psychology, it takes 11 weeks to feel better after a relationship ends. But a separate study found it takes closer to 18 months to heal from the end of a marriage.
So, how does one get through life in that healing period? We asked experts, and here’s what they have to say.
Take time to grieve your loss
From being with someone every day of your life to having no contact can be a very painful experience. So, it’s important for you to come to terms with this new reality, no matter how painful it may seem. While it may be tempting to pretend like nothing happened, it will only prolong the process of getting over the break up. Acknowledge the pain and then attempt to move on.
Reconnect with yourself
This is the best time to bring the focus back to you. Relationships can be time consuming and many times the focus is on “We” and “Me”. Take this time to find what it is that makes you happy. Find a new talent, reconnect with friends and family, and focus on your physical and mental health. The end of an old relationship can be the beginning of a new one – with you.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
Many times, the end of a relationship is not a mutual decision. It may come as a shock. Thus feelings of rejection and pain may be apparent. Just because your partner has ended the relationship doesn’t mean that you are unlovable. Rather than focusing on what you did wrong, look for what you can do to make yourself feel better. Talk to your friends, family about your feelings. Talking through emotions and sharing about your breakup may also give you a chance to look at this event from a different perspective.
Time heals all
You may not realise this the moment you break up, but time can heal the worst of the heartbreaks. Thinking about this break up may not be so painful a few months down the line. Then, you will only think of the happy memories with your partner. Isn’t that the best way to cherish something that was once beautiful?
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