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Become financially stable

Don’t do anything stupid. It’s just a matter of time, says Candice Pinto.

india Updated: Apr 19, 2010 16:57 IST
Candice Pinto
Candice Pinto
Hindustan Times

My girlfriend and I are very much in love. The problem is that my dad wants me to complete my studies in a hostel that is far away. We are in the ninth grade. I don’t want to go. Please help.
To make things simpler try and find a good school that is nearer. Your dad will never think ill of you. Speak to him about your studies. At the end of it he is your dad and it’s better if you speak to him directly and work things out. I’m sure he is not as hard as he may seem to be.

I am 47 and have a 15-year-old daughter. We were very emotionally connected till a few months back. She was very frank with me but now she is quite reticent. It has created a lot of confusion in my mind and I get frustrated when she ignores my questions. I think she has a boyfriend and this is the reason I think she is going away from me. Whenever I see her she is busy talking on the phone or on Facebook. What should I do?
She is a teenager. I guess you got so emotionally attached that it’s making her uncomfortable. You may not realise it but it’s normal for her to behave in that manner. As far as she dating, well times have changed. It’s not in your hand or mine to stop her from seeing someone. The more you try and stop her, the more she will go ahead and do it. Just give her some space and don’t get impatient with the way she behaves.

I’m 17 and I have a boyfriend. We both are the same age but different caste. I’m a Maharashtrian and he is from Rajasthan. We both have been together for nine months. We know that in future our parents would not accept our relation because of our caste difference. Please help.
Keep your relationship going. Since you two are 17, you very well have a long way to go. I would suggest you complete your studies and become financially stable. Once that’s done everything will automatically fall in place. Don’t do anything stupid that would upset your parents. It’s just a matter of time.

I am a 16-year-old girl. Recently I discovered that my dad is having an extra-marital affair with his colleague for the past five years. I am very disturbed by this as I love both my parents equally. At the same time, I can't see my mom suffering as my dad often ill-treats her. I am very upset due to this. Please help.
If you feel uncomfortable about it, then you must speak to your dad about it and do so when your mom is not at home. You will know exactly what he has to say. It would be up to you to decide what steps have to be taken.

I’m a 16-year-old girl and my best friend has proposed to me. I said no to him but he keeps pestering me to reconsider. At the same time, I like another guy who is in love with another close friend of mine. Please guide.
You need to ask yourself, if the guy who you love, loves you or no. If you need to clarify things, go and tell him how you feel about him. If he is not interested in you then you will get your answer. Your best friend does love you, so give it time till you sort this issue out and then tell your best friend what you have to say. Ask him to hold on till then.

I'm a 19-year-old boy and I masturbate three to five times a week. Can it affect on my life?
Your life wont be affected. It’s normal to do what your doing. And you can’t avoid it but try diverting your mind elsewhere. Keep your self occupied with other activities and everything will fall in place. It’s nothing to be so stressed about. So chill.

I am a 13-year-old boy. Recently I proposed to a girl who is in my school. We have known each other for more than four years and I sent her a love note on Facebook. It’s been a week and she is not responding to me. Please advice.
You’re just 13 and it’s not the appropriate medium to just start a relationship. She went off your list as she was just trying to be friendly with you and you just blew everything out of proportion. Get to know her better and rather than proposing online you should have waited for a while to get to know her and how she feels about you. Try leaving her a message apologising and maybe you two can start on the same foot again.

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First Published: Apr 19, 2010 15:36 IST