Digital contacts that prolong the healing process after a break up
From texting our ex-lovers asking for closure to checking their social media accounts constantly to learn about the new developments in their lives, here are a few digital contacts that we must avoid to speed up the healing process.
A break up in a relationship can be a very messy affair. When two people are attracted to each other, and they find a way to separate and terminate their relationship, it can take a toll on the physical, mental and the emotional health. But with the digital boom where we have the information about other people right at our fingertips, the break up can be a prolonged process as well. We have the tendency of looking at our ex-lover’s whereabouts even after the break up and that creates more curiosity in us. Often ending up meeting them or communicating with them can delay the moving on process as well. In her recent Instagram post, Marriage and Family Therapist Elizabeth Earnshaw addressed this process and wrote, “Did you know that there is a reason people suggest a no contact rule after a break up? Every time you see someone, you’re still attracted to, one of two things will happen- either high level of dopamine and a related hormone, norepinephrine, are released. These chemicals make us giddy, energetic, and euphoric. But it doesn’t last. As soon as the supply is gone, there is a crash. This means you’ll feel worse after feeling the high.”
Elizabeth further noted down the digital contacts that we must avoid after a break up to help us in moving on faster and lead a healthier life. They are, as follows:
Checking for view: On Instagram, Whatsapp and other social media platforms, we have the provision to know who has viewed our stories. Checking our stories constantly to see if our ex has viewed them or not, can create a surge of sadness in us.
Viewing their posts: Constantly looking up the ex on social media platforms to know about their life, their whereabouts and how they are doing can be an exhausting affair for our own mental health.
Asking for closure: Text messages or phone calls asking for a relationship closure creates communication between the ex-lovers. This can further slow up moving on.
Checking their friends: Checking the social media accounts of the friends and acquaintances of the ex-lover to know about the new developments in their life can get very toxic for our own mental health.